01. The Room Above the Indian Grocery
02. Where are My Socks and Other Mysteries of Love
03. If You Can't Win, Shoot for a Tie
04. Do Someone a Favor and It Becomes Your Job
05. Never Play Leapfrog with a Unicorn
06. Never Try to Teach a Pig to Sing
07. Two Wrongs are Only the Beginning
08. Never Wear Earmuffs in a Bed of Rattlesnakes
09. Where's There's a Will, There's a Won't
10. When You're Over the Hill, You Pick Up Speed
11. Experience is Something You Don't Get Until Just After You Need It
12. Doing It the Hard Way is Always Easier
13. If Anything Can Go Wrong, It Will